Prisma ♦︎ Inbox

[loungelizard]

Inbox

video ⬤ audio ⬤ text ⬤ delivery

Hi there! You've reached the ansafone of Larry Laffer.
If this is a booty call, please hang up and try again until I pick up.
Otherwise, leave a message at the beep
and I'll get back to you as soon as possible!

Comments

Delivery

[riptidequeen]

[A small gift will end up at Larry's doorstep or actual mailbox, there is no tag as to who it is from but inside is a keychain. Because the gift giver had no idea what would be a good gift and some Prismal clerk helped her pick it out.]

[loungelizard]

[What a cute gift! Since he has no keys, lanyards, or leashes to put it on, it will -- for now -- be hung up on a magnet on his fridge.

Later down the line, it will be attached to the key he uses to get into Rue Lette's jewelry box, once he has one.]

text | j.valentine

[torsion]

[ Just this picture, nothing else. ]

[loungelizard]

I don't get it. Meat cake? Meat pie? Beef cake?

Oh. It's "beefcake," isn't it?

Is this a picture you found or did you actually run across this at the grocer's?

[torsion]

It's steak butchered in the shape of two halves of a heart.
It's not a joke. :(
Yeah. I bought it.

[riptidequeen]

[Ring ring ring.

Lapis has become aware of something she did which was bad, so she is going to try and contact the person she did the thing to.

So ring ring ring, Larry.]

[loungelizard]

Oh, sorry. I guess I was thrown off by that packaging...it's kind of impractical for meat, don't you think?

What are you going to do with it?

[Does he mean "how are you going to cook it" or "are you going to share that with anyone" or "is it meant for something other than eating"? Who knows.]

[loungelizard]

[It rings a handful of times before he actually picks up--after checking the caller ID. His voice is sticky-sweet and cheerful.]

Heyyy baby! You've reached Larry Laffer. How can I satisfy you today?

[torsion]

Figure it doesn't matter either way. This place is full of things like that.
And I'm going to eat it.
Was gonna ask if you'd like to join me, but don't know if you'll be weird about it.

1/2

[loungelizard]

Me? Weird? Whatever do you mean?

2/2

[loungelizard]

...

No, really. What do you mean?

[torsion]

You know exactly what I mean.
Everyone has their preferences, I get it. Different people want different things and I don't begrudge anyone for it.

[loungelizard]

No, I don't. What's a little meat between friends?

[torsion]

Exactly. Just being friends.
That okay by you?

[loungelizard]

...Jill, have you been under the impression that I've been trying to seduce you this whole time?

I knew you were off-limits when we first met. I'm always like this; I can't turn it off. So if your definition of "just being friends" means that I'm not allowed to check you out, flirt with you, or buy you the occasional drink, even though I know that dating is off the table...then no, we can't "just be friends".

[Also, yeah, she's that kind of super insane hot that makes him want to get walked all over in stilettos...but also has a lot of baggage that he can't help her with, and that's a major turn-off for him.]

I'm sorry babe. I'm just being honest.

[riptidequeen]

[Well, that was not the answer she was expecting. Then again she's not an expert on using phones so that could be a normal way to answer the phone.

It also means that Larry's sickly-sweet cheerfulness throws her for a loop.]

Hi Larry, and it's Lapis. [She'll correct him till the end of time when she remembers to.]

I, ah... need to apologize.

[loungelizard]

[He has no idea what's triggered to this, so he thinks it's some sort of lead-in for something.]

Oooh? Do tell!

[riptidequeen]

[Okay, she can do this. It's not that hard, this isn't like the Jasper thing at all.]

How can you... I could have almost killed you!

[Yeah no, this isn't going to be easy on her end.]

[loungelizard]

Um.

[What.]

...I'm sorry?

[And she said she was the person who had to apologize!]

[riptidequeen]

[Deep breath.]

When we, for twelve hours. That's not normal for humans.

[Guess who learned that their time together was not a good thing? Well, it was a good thing but it's not healthy.]

[torsion]

Ha, no. Not at all! It's more the way you acted and what you said when I went in to kiss your cheek.
You didn't need to go into a spiel.
Although I didn't realize you were "checking" me out.
Can appreciate a firm boundary, but I wasn't talking about all that. Anyway, my only qualm is you gotta let me buy you a drink every now and then, too.
:)

[loungelizard]

Twelve...?

[What. x2]

...Are you talking about the time we had sex?

[riptidequeen]

Yes, I am.

[What else could she be talking about?]

[loungelizard]

Oh, THAT? Like I said, my policy is "don't do anything to me that you wouldn't want me to do to you." Just laying down the ground rules! If you keep it fair game, so will I.

Buying each other weirdly shaped steak and beer included.

[loungelizard]

[With a sigh:] Ooooookay.

[Well, here's a weird heart-to-heart he wasn't expecting to have.]

So it may have been the longest marathon I've ever had, and I may have been incredibly sore for the next two days, but it takes a lot more than that to kill Larry Laffer.

[Or a lot less, if it's funnier that way.]

It's what you needed -- and it's not like I asked you to stop.